Go to sleep, or I will put you to sleep!

I'm actually talking to myself with that one. I have not gone to sleep until 2 am for the last few nights. I have become obsessed once again. First it was "Twilight" (so over that), then blogging (hmm...that's waning a bit), then couponing (still going strong), and now "Lost" (Holy mother of M-O-L-Y! Could the nerd coils be any hotter right now!)

I'm always a little late jumping on any fad or bandwagon. I know big bangs are out, but are A-line bobs still in? OK, good. So, even though Lost began in 2004 I didn't become a true follower until 2008. Four whole stinkin' years I was missing out. So, after the ever-so-gentle prodding of my SIL, Tiesha, and brother, Jason, I watched the first DVD of the first season. So, about this time last year I watched Seasons 1-3, then just recently watched Season 4, had DVR'd Season 5 and as of last night I can join the ranks of Lost freaks. Ah, it feels so good to be "current."

So, sorry, right now instead of spying on my fellow bloggies, I will be immersing myself over at www.ew.com where Doc Jensen is my new crush. This guy is either brilliant or he has some insider knowledge about the island. In either case, I have become mesmerized, and will now fully participate in the postulations, what-ifs, and maybes of all things LOST.

This Doc Jensen fella is all about the literary allusions of Lost. I admit, I do find his theories pretty much right on and fascinating. Finally, six years after the fact, lessons from my literary theory and criticism class are finally clicking. I sat glossy-eyed and in another dimension myself in that class and have no idea how I survived. But Doc's analysis of names and symbols in Lost are finally making elements from that stinkin' criticism class make sense.

I have to confer with my brother after Lost episodes and he has ever so enlightened me with his own theories:

1. Richard Alpert (hmm...he is good-looking meat) is really an Egyptian who has found a portal from ancient times that has lead him, and possibly others, to the island. This would explain the black eyeliner. And this would also explain the giant statue, whose only remains are a four-toed sandled food. The statue, which we only get a quick look at during one of the time warps, resembles the many-eared god of the underworld, Hades. (Jason theory)

2. Eloise is Daniel Faraday's mother. She is also the woman with the gun during the "Jughead" episode. She is referred to as Ellie. (Jason theory)

3. If Ellie is Eloise, I'm betting that Daniel Faraday is the love child of Ellie and Charles Widmore, who were both in Alpert's group of others at the same time. This would explain Widmore financing Faraday's ventures. (my theory)

4. Claire is not really dead - and I suspect that at some point we will see a reemergence of dead characters who will be resurrected in some respect according to the islands wishes.....OK, that one's a stretch. (my theory)

5. It's hard to say who is absolutely good and who is absolutely bad. I think we'll find Charles Widmore is a better man than that lying sucker Ben Linus would have us think. After all, he told Desmond how to reach Eloise and isn't Eloise the master-mind behind getting everyone's butts back to fantasy island? Why doesn't Eloise just send her former lover back there herself? (my theory)

6. John Locke got talked out of killing himself by Ben....yet another example of Ben's smooth convincing. The island wanted John to die (not sure why yet), but Ben is once again assuming control - just like he did when Locke was supposed to turn the wheel, but Ben did it instead. (my theory)

7. The Dharma Initiative's symbol looks eerily like a snake - snakes were very much a part of Egyptian life/mythology. We think of serpents as evil (Adam and Eve), but not necessarily so for the Egyptians. (my theory)

There is so much going on in the show. I hope they can tie up so many lose ends. What about Walt and the other special children that were on the flight? Anyway, I will be all about LOSTing it on Friday mornings now. And Sam better not change the channel and screw up my recordings. Doesn't he know I have "lost" of TV to keep up on??